The Bachelor: Episode #9

I'm so excited for the fantasy suites tonight that I'm doing a live running blog, and then adding pictures after the fact.  Check back in a couple of days to see the blog with more commentary and pictures.  It's disturbing how much I love this show.

By the way, three weeks until the end of the season and we still don't know who the next Bachelorette is going to be.  Does that mean they're not doing a Bachelorette season this year?  Or waiting until the fall to launch it?  This is upsetting.  I need more Chris Harrison in my life.

7:53: Very intrigued by tonight, especially given the news about Sean being a born-again virgin with fantasy suites on the horizon tonight.

7:59: Here we go!

8:02: Sean is wearing some bright shorts.

My shorts must match the colour of the roses I hand out.

8:04: My main takeaway from the Catherine recap is that Sean is a dork looking for a dork.

8:06: Is it even possible to put together a recap of AshLee's relationship with Sean without a shot of her crying?

Shockingly, AshLee shed tears while talking about her issues.

8:08: Who else was excited to see the shot of Lindsay in a wedding dress again?

It's really something that the girl who showed up in a wedding dress is still here.

8:09: Who had 9 minutes in the "How long into the episode until they show Sean shirtless?" pool?

8:16: Neon birds!

I'm sure PETA would have something to say about this.

8:19: "I feel like I'm with my high school sweetheart."  Well, Lindsay is only 24, so it's not that much of a stretch.

8:21: Monkeys!  Monkeys!!!  MONKEYS!!!

Lindsay was rockin' that bikini.

8:32: I wish I could bet on things like "Lindsay will accept the fantasy suite".

8:34: It was cute how Lindsay was so nervous before telling Sean she loved him.

8:36: Sean keeps on saying that he is not just looking for a wife, he is looking for his best friend.  Somewhere in Dallas, his current best friend is very upset.

8:43: AshLee with the quote of the episode: "I don't do caves."

8:46: Why does AshLee need to turn everything she does with Sean into a freakin' metaphor about her insecurities?  We get it, you have issues.

It's not just a cave.  It represents my life.

8:51: How much do you want to bet that AshLee turns the issue of the fantasy suite into a metaphor?

9:01: Has anyone else noticed that Sean's kissing technique doesn't look...ideal?

I'm gonna say that this might be too much tongue.

9:16: It's amazing how many different ways they can mention sex in the fantasy suite via metaphor.

9:19: "I never thought a boy like him would like a girl like me."  Really?  "Boy"?  Are you twelve, Catherine?

9:26: Chris Harrison sit-down interview time.  This is always good.

9:27: You can totally read between the lines - Sean is sending AshLee home.

9:38: Sean is giving the "I know I'm about to destroy this girl's world" face during AshLee's video.

9:45: Lindsay!  Did she just randomly swear for no reason before Sean even handed out a rose?

Yep, she sure did.

9:46: Cue the AshLee tears in 3...2....1...

9:47: LONGEST.  PAUSE.  EVER.

9:48: AshLee suddenly looks like a psychotic serial killer.

9:49: AshLee, the queen of metaphors, decides to go with one more.  I'm a strong, independent woman.  I do not need you to open this door for me.  I can open it myself.

9:50: I think it's safe to say that AshLee's emotional walls are back up.

Walls back up?  Confirmed.

9:54: Having seen the harshness of AshLee's exit, my new theory about the letter he receives in the finale is that it is from AshLee and she just rips him apart and tells him that he ruined her life.

9:59: The Women Tell All is going to be epic.  Think of all the storylines: Dez, her brother, and how Sean made the biggest mistake of his life.  Lesley and what could have been if she had just dropped the L-bomb.  AshLee's exit.  Sarah and her one-armedness.  Tierra.  It's going to be amazing.

Late breaking news: They're announcing The Bachelorette on the season finale of The Bachelor.  I really really really hope it's Lesley or Dez.